My One Big Secret You Don’t Know

image

October 31, 2008 I created my blog and wrote my first post. I was so obsessed that weekend, I wrote 5 posts and barely slept, one of them, The Best Trim Colours: NOT Cloud White, is still one of my top 10 most read posts.

If you have read my blog for a long time, you’ll notice that I always say ‘we’ and ‘us’ but you have never seen a picture of who I’m with. And if you’re a regular reader, you will have already figured it out.

That I am in a relationship with a woman.

Terreeia and I met in 1998 when I participated in a six month leadership training program through Landmark Education. She was the head coach.

I was married 15 years ago for one year. My ex-husband and I had no idea how to communicate so that’s why it didn’t last. My relationships with men before and after my marriage were not spectacular enough to write about.

I am not an easy person to be with. I participated in Landmark Courses for 10 years because I have a tortured head. I analyze everything down to the minutia and I process my upsets out loud. For this reason, I don’t hold a grudge, forgive easily and almost instantly. But I certainly have a temper. One of the reasons why I was committed to doing so many courses to learn how to communicate better was because I would say what was in my head out loud and unfiltered, and then I’d have a mess to clean up.

The men I attracted in relationships seemed to mostly fall into two extremes. The ones I could dominate so then I’d get turned off and bored really fast, or the powerful ones that wanted to dominate me. And the latter is the worst of the two, I can’t stand to be dominated. What’s great about being with a powerful woman is that it goes back and forth. Sometimes I call the shots and sometimes she does (and I’m not talking about sex).

I am not a lesbian, but I’m pretty sure I have the politics of one. And it took me 10 years of back and forth, breaking up and getting back together with Terreeia to finally realize that she is my soul mate in the world regardless of gender. We were married this past April on Earth Day.

She is the editor of the posts I’m afraid to hit publish. And lately I’ve been bored with my blog because now that you know everything about me except this, well, how long can I write about just my nephews anyway? This blog would be so much more interesting if I could write about my relationship because I have a lot to say about them.

Terreeia is the reason I haven’t told you. Being a lesbian all her life, she grew up being discriminated for being gay.

While I’m the first person to share my whole life story with someone five minutes after I’ve met them, she is the opposite of that.

She is convinced that it will be the end of this blog if I tell you. ‘But really?’, I ask myself ‘Are most people in the world so small that they can’t accept other people for their differences? Β And there are many overtly gay men who are designers, in fact I’m tired of only ever seeing male couples on the covers of shelter magazines talking about their fabulous homes.

Along with running her executive coaching and consulting business Terreeia helps me run mine.

Her title on emails to our clients is ‘Director of Customer Service and Delight’. That is who Terreeia is in the world. Before she became a consultant, she was in management in the food and beverage industry. She has won all kinds of awards for creating teams. Terreeia is obsessed with service and she is the most brilliant communicator I have ever met.

Where I’m always asking Why? Because I’m fascinated to learn what makes people tick, Terreeia always has the because. Because she actually understands on a deep level what makes people tick.

She is this amazing, gourmet cook. I haven’t been in a grocery store in years (seriously).

So I’m telling you this today because I’m not someone who hides who I am in general.

When you meet me after reading this blog and getting to know me here, I’m the same person. Β Many of you already feel like we are friends from reading my blog and it’s just not authentic that you don’t know this about me too. And the world is different now then it was 20 years ago, (I sure hope so).

Terreeia & Maria

Me and the love of my life (on vacation last year)

This post has been written for months. I wrote it one day when we were having an argument. She left because that’s how she processes stuff (I want to talk and yell a little if necessary) a little while later I called her and said “I’m about to hit publish on this post”, and she immediately rushed home to talk me out of it. I know, sneaky right?

I heard once that we can only marry someone who is either your mom, your dad, or not your mom or not your dad. Well Terreeia is like my mom who never gossips, and always takes the high road – well she takes it to the extreme, I can only strive to be like that. Β And I think your partner should make you want to be a better person.

I love you sweet Terreeia. Thanks for letting me publish this post today.

SaveSave

0 Shares

relatedPOSTS

leave aREPLY

[bws_google_captcha]

Leave a Reply

  1. Congratulations on your bravery and all that is worth celebrating in your life. This post is a jaw dropper; I first thought, “Oh, Maria’s written one of those ‘Copyblogger” headlines.” But no, this was genuine, and we all love you for that. Best wishes to you both.

  2. I’m a huge fan of your blog and design advice, and knowing you more as a person only helps enrich that experience.

    You should always feel empowered to be fully and completely who you are. Life is too short to let anything stand in the way of happiness.

    Belated congrats to you and Terreeia!

  3. Congratulations on your wedding! Wishing you both much happiness. I applaud your courage, and BTW you look fabulous in that blue!

  4. Nothing like this changes who you are or how I feel about you, I said I would miss talking to you and I do. Your class for a second time was amazing and so helpful. I truly believe who you love and marry is great, to be happy, truly happy is all that matters. Looking forward to future posts about both of your adventures… x

  5. You know i always suspected there was no Mr. in your life even tho you always said “we”. Congrats;i just wanted to let you know i still loves ya and hope to hire you someday as my house needs help, it’s still a 1980’s mess. Unfortunately never enuff $ to spend on the project but maybe one day my lottery will come in!

  6. Congratulations on your bravery!

    What’s not to celebrate about love and truth!

    I’ve never commented on your blog before [though I read it daily!] but this just called out for a high five!

    As a woman, and a truth-seeker, I support you!

    You go girl!

    • Just like Sabrina, I read all your posts and never comment (oh, btw, I officially blame you for my annoying obsession with yellow/pink undertones!). But I just wanted to share some love. πŸ™‚

      It hurts when I read that Terreeia (and so many others) thinks being in a same-sex relationship could lead them to be being rejected. And it hurts me even more to think that in some cases, it does. But I know we are heading in the right direction. And I can feel we are all in this together, whatever our sexual orientation is.

      So much love,

      Marie

  7. Congratulations! Anyone who would negatively judge you based upon who you love would not be a person one would want in ones life anyway. Thanks for sharing!

  8. What is important is that you are happy!! I LOVE your blog and wish you lived nearby so that you can do my house – SA.

  9. Everyone should be able to stand up and say “this is who I am” without fear of discrimination. Well done for doing just that. I long for a world where same-sex relationships are considered so mainstream that they no longer have to be announced, they can just be. If anyone stops reading your blog because of this news, then that is their loss. Hats off to you Maria!

  10. Hoechstetter Interiors

    Good for you for coming out, Maria! It’s a wonderful thing when people find their soulmates. Congratulations on your upcoming anniversary!

    If anyone is going to judge you negatively for being with whomever you love just because they’re the same gender, then good riddance to bad rubbish. There will always be other clients, colleagues, and even friends who *will* accept you no matter what.

    Wendy

  11. It saddens me that this is still an issue that requires bravery of those involved. It really shouldn’t make any difference who you choose to spend your life with, love is love.
    Best of luck to you both!

  12. Thank you for sharing. I just want to echo what Jan V. wrote, which says it all so well, “Congratulations! Anyone who would negatively judge you based upon who you love would not be a person one would want in ones life anyway. Thanks for sharing!”

  13. Maria – well done!! Congratulations on being so honest and celebrating who you are. Keep sharing and being you.

  14. Oh my! πŸ™‚ Congratulation Maria and Terreeia! πŸ™‚
    Maria, I could almost feel your relief, when you pushed this “publish” button. I can understand that it was quite hard not writing about this aspect of your life on your blog and in the same time it have must be so hard to make this decision.

    Wish you both tons of happiness. πŸ™‚

    P.S. It’s probably my very first comment on your blog. πŸ˜‰
    P.P.S. I can totally understand your words about attracting two kinds of men. Similar for me. But I finally decided that for sure I don’t want to have boring life and I don’t want to be the man in relationship (it wasn’t that practical decision, I simply fell in love, haha). I’m married for 7 years to a man who is full of passion and talents, but he is not an easy to deal with. But actually you could say the same about me. πŸ™‚ So with all our ups and downs and permanent work for a compromise, we’re still together, there is still passion and we are never bored. πŸ˜‰

  15. The picture is testament to your happiness and love.

    And love is never wrong!

    It takes great strength to show your “vulnerability”, which through life can manifest in so many forms, to others.

    Congratulations on your announcement.

  16. Maria, anyone who condemns you (or anyone else) for who you love is not worth having in your life. While I did suspect there was no “Mr” in your life, it was no more than a passing thought. But yes, you are right. You should be able to talk about your spouse as I do mine; to celebrate the special moments as well as the everyday ones, with those you interact with. Cheers to you both!

  17. “And the world is different now then it was 20 years ago” Absolutely! I’m still hiring your services in March or April. πŸ™‚

  18. Count me among those who had already guessed and who wondered if your relationship would be the subject of this post when I saw the title.

    Congratulations to the two of you for finding your soul mates and on your marriage!

  19. A lovely, heartfelt post, Maria. I came to know about you and your blog through Terreeia, whom I met through Landmark in TO. I have such a high regard for Terreeia, as she made such a positive and lasting impression on me. Thank you for your incredible work – I thoroughly enjoy your posts. Many blessings to you both! (I vote go vegan!)

  20. Belated congratulations on your wedding and best wishes for a long and joyful life together πŸ™‚
    I think people are generally more enlightened now and accepting of differences in just about every way, and I really can’t see that your blog will suffer in any way.
    I love the saying of Dr Seuss: People who matter don’t mind, and people who mind don’t matter.

  21. I’m happy that you’re happy, and if someone wants to discriminate – that’s their choice. Frankly, discrimination occurs all the time in our lives – b/c of what we’re wearing, who we’re with, whether we have kids or not, the colour of our hair or skin, our gender… it can’t be avoided. But what you can avoid if how you will act. Keep living your truth!! The more authentic you are, then the best you you can be.

  22. Wow! I’m so proud of you for sharing this with us. I’m so pleased that you have found someone who completes you. I’ve never commented on your blog before but we have had a phone consult- I loved you then for your honesty and I love and admire you even more now πŸ™‚

  23. Good for you! I don’t care if you are gay or green! You are still Maria! Best wishes for a long and happy life together! (I have never posted before but I just had to)

  24. What a brave and beautiful post. I am so glad that you made the decision to press publish.

    Really looking forward to hearing more about you and Terreeia on the blog in the future. Congratulations to you both!

  25. I love seeing people in love, and to me that’s all that matters. I look forward to getting to know you even better in the blog posts to come! πŸ˜€

  26. I discovered your site in the last year and enjoy your posts, but I’ve never commented before. Congratulations and best wishes to you both!

  27. Kudos to both of you! I so admire your strength and honesty. I’ve read your blog for a long time and now respect you even more. The truth shall set you free!

  28. Maria, congratulations on your marriage, and your honesty! I admit that since I knew you were married to a man before, I did assume that your current partner was a man as well, not that it makes one iota of difference to me! I will still visit your blog every week for your fantastic voice and advice. Terreeia sounds like an amazing partner; you’re lucky to have each other!

  29. Yes, I allready knew you were Gay and with a woman. Did not know she is African American. It seems as if you two love each other well. of course, I will still read your blog. you have good stuff to share. also, I too, wish I could see you and your great home on a Shelter magazine.

    Dianne from The South….TN

  30. Maria,
    Didn’t see this coming, and am delighted that you came out to us. I really don’t care who people partner with, I just want everyone to love their lives and create greater possibility in the world.
    Thank you for sharing your beloved with us. I look forward to even more dynamic posts from you!
    Landmark does indeed, change the world.
    Much love to you both.

  31. I love your blog and who you are just makes you special, it doesn’t change your message. I’ve learned so much from reading what you have to say, today is no different. Although stereotypes still exist there is clearly a strong wave of emotion and political change happening to eradicate them. I wish you both the best.

  32. Congratulations!!

    I adore you Maria. I’m so happy for you both. You are amazing, generous, giving, smart and caring!!

    I can’t wait to get to know you both better:) thanks for opening up and sharing!! XOXO

    Jennifer

  33. I bet you’re sitting by your computer right now waiting to read every new comment on this post as it publishes. I can almost see your face πŸ™‚

    Your friends who are intuitive (me) already knew.This will certainly bring in a new dimension to Colour Me Happy … and we welcome it!

    Be who you are Maria and the people who judge, just hit the delete button – and that’s not just the delete button on the keyboard.

    This is so funny because just the other day I was saying to myself, “Maria’s blog is getting a little long in the tooth. There has to be something else to give it a new life.” I love my little gift. It makes me laugh.

    Best to you Maria, Terreeia and I can’t wait to read more!!!!

  34. I am so impressed with you Maria, your are truly an inspiration on so many levels. I have been following your blog for years and today I feel that we connected emotionally. Thank you for sharing, I know it took a lot of courage. Congratulations to you and Terreeia, it sounds like you have a wonderful relationship. Keep up the good work and I am counting on you to keep blogging. Hugs.

  35. Dear Maria,

    the gender of the person you love does not change anything to your knowledge you share on this blog. Being happy is the single most important thing in life and it seems that you are happy. This is what truly and only counts.
    To many more years with your soulmate.
    Corinne

  36. Blessings on the two of you and very best wishes on your upcoming anniversary! May you have many more happy years together.

  37. A beautiful post, open, warm and loving. A testament that love comes in many shapes and sizes, and we can be open to receiving it, even when it comes from an unexpected direction. It’s our choice, not what society dictates for us. Thank you!

    xoxo
    Hannah

  38. A brave and beautiful post. Your personal life makes no difference to me and whether I read your blog or not – but I DO love that you were so honest and truthful! So – congrats on the post, the blog, and your success!

  39. Dear Maria, congratulations! I wish you many, many happy years together. I’ve been reading your blog since we met in New York at the first BlogFest several years back. And I will continue to read as long as you have something to say.

    You are so right about the shelter magazines, it is more than time that a female gay couple should be featured.

  40. Maria thank you for your courage and congratulations to you and Thereeia. Love is love is love. I would guess many of us knew intuitively, but boldly stating your love is an act of love and courage in itself. Brava! I love your blog, your advice, and your writings about your nephews πŸ™‚ So cute. Never gets tiring. We love you, Maria. God Bless.

  41. Welcome to our lives Terreeia,
    I received an email from Terreeia once and your right she was the most wonderful lady EVER. I told her I hoped you had cloned her.
    Health and happiness to you both. And imagine how many wedding gifts you would of received if you’d done this years ago ha ha.

  42. Like others, I’ve never commented before but felt this post deserved a response. Yay for you, yay for Terreeia, yay for you and Terreeia! So glad you two have found love. Nothing else much matters.

  43. Maria,
    Congratulations ! I am sure that this has been a difficult process for you. Honestly though, all that I really care about is that you are a genius at what you do. And you truly are! I am getting ready to hire you again.
    Continued blessings to you,
    K

  44. God Bless you both and I wish you all the happiness this life has to offer. You inspire me everyday about color and now you inspire me to live a more honest life. Thank you so much Maria.

  45. This post just makes me think even more of you for having the courage to write it! Congratulations to you both. I am sure you feel relieved to have finally published this post.

    I love your blog, and will always read it as long as you write it.

  46. Maria, I found your blog only a few months ago and I have enjoyed it so much. Thank you for today’s post. Your honest, refreshing, authentic approach to life comes through in everything you do and say.

  47. Wow! I’m new to the business and new to your blog. I instantly fell in love with your blog (the only one I’ve ever even looked at, really), and knew I wanted to participate in one of your workshops from the start. Every time I read your posts, I feel like I’m communicating with a friend over coffee. I’m having surgery done next week, and have your e-book printed out so I can study while I’m lying in the hospital for 5 days! It’s given me something to look forward to, honest. Now, that you’re “OUT”, I only admire and respect you more. I think there’s nothing more important than being authentic. Best wishes!

  48. Bravo…I loved you before, that was because I loved your knowledge and what you were teaching me…now I love you even more because I know where it’s all coming from. Be brave, be strong, be you. πŸ™‚

  49. Congratulations on finding the love of your life. It sounds like you have a wonderful match (right down to the blue in your holiday photo ;-). I hope this sharing only adds to your joy.

  50. Laura Jens Sisino

    Yippee! Congratulations! Finally! I have been waiting for this day for so long, I am so tickled that you hit “publish”. πŸ™‚ I am so happy to see your bravery in sharing with your readers, whom love you, your wisdom, talent and person for who you are; wonderful.

    Happier to know that you now can share with the world this very special amazing woman that has stolen your heart, given you hers, held your hand, supported you for so long and loved you unconditionally.
    We love you and we love Terreeia for who she is too…..the love of your life.

    Wishing you many many blissful years together.

    Looking forward to more interesting blogs… you never fail to disappoint. πŸ™‚

    xo

  51. Congratulations Maria! I’m so happy for you and what a relief it must be to finally be who you are (which is a brave, wonderful and super talented woman!)

    All I can say it Yay you! And if people don’t understand, well, you don’t want them hanging around your awesome blog. πŸ™‚

    Big hugs Lady!!

  52. How wonderful to meet your partner Teerria-(figured it out long time ago :)). She sounds incredibly talented! I am happy for you both, and happy for you Maria that you could finally push the “publish this post” button πŸ™‚
    You have a wonderful family!,
    Mary in Ohio

  53. Congrats to you both. It is time to recognize we all should have equal rights to love, to marry and to be with those who fulfill us.

  54. Not sure I understand the concept of not being a lesbian but in a relationship with a woman……but either way, you’re brilliant at colour and I couldn’t care less about the rest of it!

    Good for you for sharing this!

  55. I think this is the most amount of entries I have seen on your blog…and all positive and it’s still very early in the morning-so if that doesn’t prove to you (both) how OK we all are with your relationship, then what does! We all love you and your amazing talent, glad there’s someone in your life that loves you and supports you!

  56. Congratulations on your one year anniversary. You deserve happiness, and it looks live you have found that with Terreeia. I look forward to reading your valuable advice in the future, just as I have for the past 3 years. All the best!

  57. HI Maria

    So glad you shared this with us your readers and followers. In Afrikaans we have the saying when gay people let the secret out: Hy/sy het uit die kas geklim. (They climbed out of the cupboard.) A Gay pastor wrote a book with the title: ‘n Kas is vir klere.( A cupboard is for clothes.) Because your blog is about cupboards as well I was immediately thinking about this- and the fact is this is who you are and you should be accepted by everyone as such. (And not even feel scared to share) If it should be necessary to keep on hiding it from us it do not say much of us, your readers.

    Enjoy your wonderful relationship- it seems as if you were made for each other.

  58. Well knock me down with a feather – good for you both! Wishing you and Terreeia all the happiness in the world from sunny South Africa.

  59. Congratulations on having nearly a year of marriage under your belt. I love that you feel comfortable to come out- and why shouldn’t you? I hate so much that you would think for a second this would change what it means for you to be a colour expert, or to worry that people may not accept you. Makes me so angry.

    Wishing you and your wife all the best in your endeavours together! πŸ™‚

  60. Congratulations!! To share one life with someone that you love.. is a joy beyond words.

    I’m so happy that you were able to share this happiness with your tribe! I figured this out from context a long time ago. πŸ™‚

    The thing I’m most interested in is… What’s Terreeia’s favorite color?? πŸ™‚

    Cheers!

    Gail from Kansas

  61. Being authentic makes what we do in life (whatever that is) more true and valuable to ourselves and to others. Congratulations on your marriage and on this wonderful post. You make me look at the world in a different and better way with each post and this one is no different. Thank you.

  62. Somehow I always knew, Maria. Regardless of one’s personal opinion (on anything, really), that does not change the basic premise: that you (and everyone else) are a human being worthy of love and respect. I appreciated the phone consult I had with you and have implemented some of your suggestions. When I see your blog in my inbox or a post on facebook, I eagerly read to see what new tidbit I can learn. Nothing changes for me!

  63. After we talked recently, I was hoping you were going to be posting this blog. Something I truly believe in and have tried to live and pass on to my children is “Be Original , Be Yourself”. Thank you for sharing and for having the courage to do so. Congratulations to you both!

  64. A late but hearty congratulations on the wedding! I never comment on blogs, but I love your blog and I always look forward to your news posts and will continue to. Thanks for letting us into your life. You are a beautiful couple (love it how the color of your tops match!)

  65. CONGRATS on the upcoming anniversary and best wishes in your lifetime together. Well done on hitting “publish.” Have to ask – did you plan the cute matching blue outfits!? πŸ™‚

  66. I read your post twice this morning because it so caught me by surprise! Having followed your blog, and having met you, I did not see this coming! Does it change how I see you, feel about you? Yes, it actually does. I find your strength, courage and honesty quite inspirational. Maria, I admire you more today than I did yesterday, and I had plenty of admiration for you yesterday! Thanks for being so authentic, it is so refreshing! Congratulations to you and Terreeia, I wish you both a lifetime of happiness.
    xo
    ~gwen

  67. Congratulations! I never “figured it out”, just assumed your partner was a very private individual, and never gave it another moment’s thought. So this was a surprise to me. I’m delighted to see how happy you are! And I’ll be even more delighted to see the two of you in a shelter magazine!

  68. You are very courageous for this….Anyone who has found lasting love in any way, shape or form is a lucky person indeed. Thank you for sharing and may your days be filled with the happy colours you love.

  69. Maria,
    Congratulations on your marriage! We are so fortunate to live in a time when people have the freedom to be true to themselves and others. I commend your bravery. You must feel very relieved
    And empowered. You are so talented and we all get to benefit from your knowledge. Thanks for sharing yourself.

  70. Thanks for confirming what I had sensed. . . you have my vote for your happiness and I still want to take the color course. You rock.

  71. I love reading you blog. I loved going to your seminar in Atlanta a few years ago. I figured it out a long time ago. I didn’t get to speak to Terreeia to much during our seminar but she seemed lovely. Anyway, it didn’t matter then and it doesn’t matter now. I am happy for the two of you and I will continue to enjoy your blog and all the information and expertise you bring to it! Everyone deserves to have love and acceptance. You are brave and beautiful!

  72. Good for you for stepping into your truth, Maria! Your bravery will undoubtedly inspire others to own who they are as well.

    Happiness and continued success to you both.

  73. This morning, when I read your plog. Tears were wetting my face.And then,when I read all the comments from your plog readers my face got even more wet from tears. They were mothers love tears. You are beautiful loving generous miraculous daughter of mine. And I love you forever and Your beautiful Terreeia. Thank you Maria for being honest. You are truly a gift for the world.

    • Tears are streaming down my face too! I’m so happy for you Maria!

      Congratulations to you and Terreeria on your marriage and on your bravery to just be yourselves.

      The wonderful ripple-effect from your courage affects the world in a beautiful way. YAY!!!!

    • Wow! Thank-you (Maria’s mom) for such lovely and true words. Today you have been everyone’s mom by speaking so eloquently from the heart…how lucky Maria is to have such beautiful love and support. What a breath of fresh air! It is easy to see where Maria gets her strength of character. Now I have tears too…
      Maria, you are the difference between ordinary and extraordinary….continue to celebrate the journey with your lovely wife Terreeia. I very much welcome getting to know her on your blog. A new chapter..
      “Let us be grateful to the people who make us happy – they are charming gardeners who make our souls blossom”. Marcel Proust

  74. Congratulations Maria and thank you for sharing this big part of your life.

    I can’t believe that in this day and age, anyone would stop reading your fab blog because of your relationship. Your talent speaks for itself, and your ability to share is part of the charm of your blog. Thanks for sharing “the rest of the story”, and I’m excited as always to read your next post.

  75. How lovely Maria, that you feel comfortable enough with your readers & your relationship to share it with us. Better yet were the warm blessings & thoughts expressed by so many of your readers. There’s still hope in this world for happiness without judgement. Now get back to work! P.s. have you started on that outside yard yet?

  76. I’ve been reading your blog for several years now, will continue, but I have never posted.

    I never thought about your personal life one way or another, but I’m really happy that you shared with us because this honesty (for you–not us) will propel you forward.

    I’m happy that you’re happy. We need a lot more of that in the world.

    Congratulations on your marriage!

  77. I hope I live long enough that someday people will just say “So what?”
    Now, will we be seeing more pictures of the 2 of you? You look so happy. I want to see your wedding pics.

    • I hope I live long enough that there will be no need for a proclamation because any love shared between two people will be considered the norm.
      Of course for some of us it already is.

      Congratulations on your marriage Maria and Terreeia!
      Are we going to see a wedding photo, that would be a sigh moment!

  78. Doesn’t matter, won’t matter, shouldn’t matter! Congratulations on being happy and finding “the one” !

  79. BLESSINGS AND HAPPINESS TO BOTH OF YOU!!! Please don’t worry about anyone thinking anything negative. Love is love, no matter what. I will continue to be a huge fan of Color Me Happy and you Maria!

  80. Dear Maria,
    I have been a Bible believing Christian for the past 15 years of my life. The most important thing in my life above my husband , children and love for color/design is the relationship I have with Jesus. And never, never in my daily conversations with Him has He ever prompted me to withold kindness, love or charity. In fact, quite the opposite does He continually call me to love, give, be merciful and extend grace. God is the author of such things and I’m sorry that many others who claim to “know or follow” Christ, refuse to demonstrate His love.
    Maria, I believe God gave you a talent when He created you and I’m so glad you share that talent with us. Would love to attend your workshop someday and thank you personally.

    • Stacy has a way with words that I do not but I do second what she said. Christ has never taught us not to be loving. You are very talented and I look forward to more of your knowledge and excellent talent.
      I remain, ” your groupie”
      Cynthia

  81. CONGRATULATIONS! Happy for you both.

    I have been told I’m a gay man in a woman’s body.

    A great compliment.

    I am graced with incredible friends, including gay & lesbian. My life is rich.

    Wish you had shared earlier. No feelings of hiding your joy. Glad that blip of time is over.

    XO T

  82. I am so glad you are brave enough to “hit publish”. I only sort of wondered why you never showed a photo of your parnter, but not really, because you are so talented that I was focused on your beautiful interiors.( just guessed you were keeing that private, which I understood ) Your style is fabulous and your blog is one I look forward to every day. So, tell Terreela, not so, not the end…! Your blog brings great joy. Please never stop writing!

  83. Awesome post, Maria! I feel blessed to have met you in real life last month. You’re doing great and have met someone who you love being with. I think that’s wonderful. I may not be your BFF, but I can be a BF (Big Fan).

    With warm, peace and happiness,

    Alison

  84. Sharon @ Elizabeth & Co.

    Your blog is one of my very favorites Maria. I am so fascinated with color and I learn something new from you with every post. Still not sure I can pick the perfect paint color, but I’m getting there. I can’t say that this post surprised me. You’ve given us plenty of hints. You can share your personal life on your blog or not, whatever feels right for you. I’m just really glad to hear that you have someone in your life who makes you happy! And keep the color advice coming, I still need it!

  85. Congratulations on your upcoming anniversary! While the world is very different than 20 years ago, I think it is still scary to reveal a very personal side of yourself on the internet. Kudos to you for being brave, and best wishes for many more years of happiness together!

  86. Wow, I didn’t see this coming. Quite a shocker. I look forward to each of your newsletters and posts and will continue to do so. I do have one question. You say in your post that you are not a lesbian. If you are not, then how do you define this relationship. Not that you have to give an account here, but being in a relationship with another woman and declaring that you are not a lesbian is a bit confusing on several fronts.

  87. Authenticity, takes courage and to share who we are is not easy in this world. I am so happy for the abundance of love in your life Maria. My best to you & Terreeia.

  88. I am so relieved! I thought you were going to tell us that you are a republican! Now I have to read why cloud white isn’t the perfect trim color.

  89. Maria, you did it!! Yay, I’m so glad you did and it’s wonderful to hear about you and Terreeia! I wish you both huge success, love and happiness and I’m sure you coming out in the open will be a good thing for both of you. You’re lucky to have found each other and at the end of the day that’s all that really matters! God Bless you both.

  90. Wish you all the happiness in the world – oh, wait, you already have that! Good advice is good advice, and yours is the best I’ve read.

  91. Well, I didn’t think I could be any more impressed with you than I already was but … I was WRONG!

    Thank you for sharing. Knowing so much about you is a delight.

    xx and xx for brave Terreeria too!

  92. Hello Maria!
    I’ve been following you for 5 years when you first started blogging, and I am shocked! I had to read your post twice. Not that it matters, and I am happy for you because I think you’re a very nice person, and I’ve always enjoed your blogs. Shocked, maybe, that I never suspected as you were always so businesslike. But I commend you for the courage to be honest and connect with your readers on a personal level. Congratulations to you both and may you have a lifetime of happiness!

  93. Maria,
    I been an avid reader for a few years now and I have to say there has been a time in the last year or more that I felt concern for you – -worried for some reason?? Is that funny??? Suspected you’ve been holding back – – along with moving into a new home with a major remodel going on. So now we all know – -you’ve been a very busy girl!! So now let loose on all your fans and no more holding back!! Wish you all the happiness of a color me happy world!
    xxxoooxxx – Happy Reader Becky

  94. Maria,
    Though we are seemingly still a long way from there, it is my most sincere desire that we live in a world where none of this would ever matter. You, along with countless other courageous people, have taken us one step closer. Besides, I am sick of all the gay men getting more credit than the amazing women in this industry. Show ’em girls!

  95. I conrgratulate you on the courage it took to share your life with your readers. I think your blog will only soar to the next level from here on because you will be sharing your authentic self.

  96. You and Terreela are fortunate to have found each other. Much happinesss and delight. Keep on blogging, it’s part of who you are. We love that, too.

  97. michelle from md interior design

    Hi Maria,
    Congratulations on voicing your secret!
    I’ll still read your blog.
    Wishing you both much success and happiness today and in the future.

  98. Congratulations on your marriage and upcoming anniversary. I can’t say I am surprised as I caught the “pronoun game” a while ago. I did feel the spouse/partner pictures were conspicuously absent, but understood this was your blog and your choice.

    It is such a blessing to finally find your soulmate. I can imagine it was hard not shouting it/sharing your joy with the world. Who doesnt want to share their joy? And to not be able to brag about your significant other, for you Mara had to be a strain. I know, I would have struggled.

    Im glad you shared this post. While your blog has been far the most educational home blog I read, I always felt I would have liked to know more about the real Maria. Count me in as a blog follower.

  99. Hi Maria! Wow–I’ve been reading your blog for a year and took your class last may/June? in Toronto, but I’ve never sent a response until now (to any blog for that matter!) I am truly so happy for you. Congratulations on your marriage, and being brave enough to share your “secret” with your readers. Your authenticity, generosity, and personal voice are why I have enjoyed your blog so much. So kudos to you for stepping it up a notch! I look forward to reading your blog for many years to come!

  100. JoyceB in Atlanta

    I began reading with dread, thinking you were quitting your blog or announcing something dreadful. Thank goodness you were just professing your love! Some day, one will not have to announce the gender of their chosen soul mate. Thank you for opening your heart to us. Love comes in all sorts of packages, but is mostly processed through the mind. Great soul mates often communicate best by being on the same brain wave. How wonderful the two of you found each other and can celebrate your unity and differences in marriage. I’ve been married to the same man for nearly 42 years, and always wondered who that exceptionally patient ‘man’ in your life is. Now I completely understand. Much happiness to you both.

  101. Thank you Maria, I must say I only recently started reading your blogs and really not even sure now how I found you however, I am so HAPPY I did..
    I look to your blogs for inspiration, possibly something I am working on that I am stuck trying to figure out, and there it is in detail helping me..And sometimes I read them just because I like you. Your wonderful caring personality shines through in every word.
    Congratulations! I am thrilled that you are happy. I am sure this blog was one of the most difficult tasks you have ever done. What a relief it must be for you. Truly, we can see your honesty and committment to your work and the passion you have for all that you do. I can only say that your soul mate Terreeia certainly encourages and supports everything in your life. Those are the qualities we search for in a partner. And finding true love! Kudos to both of you for finding that happiness with each other..

    Stay Happy Maria..
    I will continue to be one of your biggest fans!

  102. Congratulations. As others have said, you show much courage with your openness. I was particularly struck by your comment that you are not a Lesbian, but have met your soulmate. I think there are many people in the world who would chose a partner were it not for the “baggage” that comes with labeling…from both sides of gender politics.

    Bravo. I wish you both well – for a very very long time.

  103. Maria,
    Although this is my first post, I read your blog all the time and I really enjoy it!
    I have to tell you that I already knew! You always said “we” but that was it… so I have to say I’m not surprised at all! But very happy for you and your partner. Congratulations to you both! You are really lucky to have found your soul mate!

  104. Hi Maria – I’ve been following your blog for 2-3 years now, so I knew that you were in a relationship with a woman (I’m a super-detail oriented person, so pick up on EVERY little thing, it’s such an annoying trait that I have!) But, it’s WONDERFUL to learn more about your wife! It always felt like I connected 95% to you because you never came out and mentioned anything directly related to her. Not that you’re obligated to share all sorts of personal stuff and all. You’ve got a designer’s color blog. BUT, since you didn’t reference her at all, it always felt like you were holding something back. Especially since I knew she was there. So, now I’m thrilled to know more about YOU, and feel satisfied with a 100% connection. : )

    Hugs,
    Kelly

  105. It takes a lot of courage to share personal details on a blog, I can only imagine the turmoil you must have experienced. Thank you for sharing your life & congratulations to you & Terreela.

    Barb

  106. Maria, I think I’ve read every one of your posts (or close to it), and I remember the post from a couple of years back when you mentioned you had met the live of your life, who is your best friend. I remember feeling the sense of… Well, *happiness* you began to convey in all your posts. And I remember wondering if you were ever going to tell us about her. Congratulations and thanks for opening up about the dearest and most important part of your life. And thanks to Terreeia for agreeing to hit “publish”.

    Your readers are still here, Maria! We love you for your personality, expertise, and your passion for color (and for helping all of us get it right). And nothing about that has changed.

    Best of everything to you both, and looking for more great things to come from Colour Me Happy!

  107. Oh Happy Day! Maria, what a wonderful, warm, honest, generous post. I’ve read so many of the comments before mine and I’m overjoyed that so many of your followers have written such positive, accepting replies. Congratulations on your Marriage. I’m sending love to you both for a lifetime of love, health and happiness. You are very special to me.

  108. ..and the world keeps turning…. and I bet you both have let out a giant sigh of relief. And everything will continue to get better for you and all those around you. Congratulations

  109. It must be a relief to be open about it all now. It certainly doesn’t change anything for me, an avid reader of your blog for a long time. I had figured it out quite a while ago. No one blinks at all the stories in shelter magazines and books about two men together, so why would this matter? For a long time I never mentioned that my husband is 17 years younger than I, but when I did, quite a few people wrote to me that they have a similar age difference. We have been married 22 years! I will continue

  110. Maria
    In this day and age, I can’t believe that anyone would ever judge you for being happy regardless of the gender of your partner. Congratulations on your marriage, and may your lives be filled with the happiness that you so deserve. Keep up the wonderful work!

  111. I have read every post of yours since I started following your blog about 2 years ago. I will say I assumed when you said “partner” in your posts you meant a man; I just assumed he was very private and didn’t want to be brought into blog-land. I am so happy for both you and Terreeia! I wish you both every happiness; sounds like you have a perfect fit in one another. I look forward to all your brilliant posts to come, and thanks so much for all you do here.

  112. Congratulations for your courage and thank you for trusting us (your readers) to react with kindness and respect as you reveal your authentic self. We probably also need to thank Terreeia for agreeing to be revealed in such a public forum.

  113. I’m another one who thought that you were probably with a woman, so actually knowing doesn’t make a difference. Although I have beliefs, I like people and have friends based on who they are, not on their sexual preferences.

    The thing that really got my attention was your saying that you might go vegan. It may be very fashionable, but it’s not really a healthy diet because it is so difficult to get sufficient protein. You have to really think about protein and count grams and know the kinds of foods that contain the various essential amino acids (the ones your body cannot produce) so that you get a sufficient amount of all of them every day. The other problem with a vegan diet is that it contains no source of vitamin B12, which is another essential nutrient. You have to supplement. In my simple way of thinking, if our bodies require a nutrient that can only be obtained from animal products, then we should eat animal products. We just need to be responsible about it–grass fed and organic being the best.

    Now–I hope–back to color!!

    • Actually, it’s easy to get enough protein from a vegan dieta (yes you do need to supplement B12). Dr. John MacDougall’s and the Happy Herbivore’s websites are great information sources for learning more about going vegan.

  114. Congratulations, on your marriage Maria and Terreeia! Like many others, I have long assumed you were together and felt badly that felt you couldn’t tell us. Be who you are and love who you love. I’m delighted for you that you don’t feel you have to hide such an important part of your life anymore.

  115. Best wishes on your marriage. So happy for you both! I know from my friends who are gay that your life is only going to get richer and happier after this post. Wishing you all good things…

  116. This is the beginning of something even bigger for you; complete happiness and peace.
    I plan to continue reading your posts, your honest has only changed one thing for me; huge amounts of respect for you although I already felt this for you, but now in a very different way.

    Have a WONDERFUL day!

    Niina

  117. I’ve never commented on your blog before but this post has moved me. Love yourself, the people around you and be happy. Thank you for sharing so much of yourself!

    PS. Your mom’s comment is so beautiful that it made me weep. You are lucky to be so loved.

  118. Thank you for sharing with us and congratulations!

    I am hoping this month that the US Supreme Court does the right thing on CA Proposition 8…

  119. Congratulations to you both! Maria, I’ve been a reader of your blog for many months and you are an inspiration on many levels. How wonderful to live authentically and love unapologetically.. So happy for you!

  120. I hope I live to see the day that a story like this is not a story. It’s sad to me that this is something you felt you could not share, especially if it was something you DID want to share.

    I’m happy for your happiness.

    Now carry on with some colour talk. πŸ™‚

  121. Thank you for sharing with such honesty and passion for healthy, truthful living! And you both look amazing in that gorgeous blue! XOXOXO

  122. I always think about the courage it must take to share this. You are still the same Maria I have come to know and admire. This is one part of many that make you who you are. Sounds like to me you are truly HAPPY!

  123. No surprise. I read the subcontext as did many others. It makes no difference whatsoever to me. Congratulations on your marriage and the freedom that comes with telling the truth. How sad that it had to be a big announcement, that anyone would think differently about your skills either way. I love your blog and I’m sure if we met, I’d love you and Terreeia, too.

  124. Those who matter don’t mind and those who mind don’t matter. It is so inspirational when someone speaks their truth. Thank you for sharing your story!

  125. Congratulations on your marriage (and almost happy anniversary!) and on finding a fulfilling, supportive and happy relationship! And thanks for sharing this part of your life with us.

  126. I feel better knowing that letting this all out thru your post must make you feel better. How difficult it must have been for you to not say anything about this very important relationship before. I can’t wait to see how you’re posts improve (not that they’re not already fabulous!) because you no longer have to keep this part of your life a secret.

  127. Congrats on being open and, I’m sure, being able to breathe a sigh of relief! The mental gymnastics required to keep certain things private must be exhausting. I loved meeting you in class in February, and have learned SOOO much… I’ve been to many classes, in all areas of painting and design, but yours was by far the most informative and career-enhancing, and I’m honored to have been a part of it. Glad you’ve found a “balanced” relationship, that is so key in life. Here’s to a wonderful 2013 for both of you!! πŸ˜€

  128. The end of the blog! Oh no, what a horrible thought!!! So thrilled that you published this post and shared your happiness with your devoted readers. I want to see you both on the cover of a magazine showcasing your amazing work!!!

  129. Hi Maria,
    How you live privately doesn’t in any way take away from your talented gift for communicating what you have learned and generously share with us. I am very grateful for you, especially when I use your large color samples and impress clients with the perfect color selections!

    While I am a traditionalist when it comes to marriage, I can certainly understand the bond that two women can have that no man can fill! (I’ve been married 30+ years). But no judgment here; I’m happy that you are happy. Best wishes.

  130. Katherine Robertson

    Awesome. Just awesome! Congratulations on your marriage to the love of your life. I’ve received an occassional email from Terreeia and she is without a doubt a huge asset to every aspect of your life and work.

    I already knew before I hired you. Really didn’t give it a second’s thought. It’s your personal life, I just needed your colour expertise! My husband thinks the world of you too and we were just discussing you this weekend as his office is expanding and needs some new colours! We’ll be in touch soon.

  131. Oh Maria, you do not need to worry! If any small minded person did not hire you because of this, well you would not have wanted to work with them in the first place would you have?

    Welcome Terreeia : )

    Onward and upward!!

    xo

  132. Wow – what wonderful news. Just figured I was about to learn more about white that I did not already know!! Congratulations to both of you on this big step. I hope it brings you peace.

  133. So what does this have to do with anything? Thanks for sharing, but one’s sexuality, choice of partners, etc, is theirs. Has nothing to do with me, and does not change my opinion of anything or anyone. And, when it gets to the point that this is non-news, we will all be much happier. I am glad you found someone to love and who loves you.

  134. Wow…. I admire and am inspired by your willingness β€” and Terreeia’s β€” to be revealed to us. I’m an admirer of you professionally, your superlative methods of color selection and, now, truly impressed by the level of personal integrity that you bring to your readers. Thanks for being a great example.

  135. maria… I am one of those kinds of people that for whatever reason…the people I met “first” are extra special to me.You were one of my First blog loves, one of the ones I read nearly daily this bit on truth only makes me love you more…congrats and I am so happy for you.

  136. Congratulations on your marriage, your courage and that you love us enough to share your happiness with us. I’ve been to Landmark as well, and I can tell you it is a life-changing event. You come away with a true understanding of yourself and the world and see that being you – whoever you are – is so much more that you ever knew. xoxo

  137. I am happy for you…glad you don’t have to hide anything anymore. Just be yourself, keep sharing your discoveries about color and design, that’s why we love your blog!

    Lisa

  138. Maria,
    Congratulations to both of you! I have a sibling who is also gay and am well aware of the prejudice that some people have. Just remember that it is their problem, not yours and you should never, ever let that interfere with your happiness. I wish you both all the best!

  139. Congratulations, I am so happy for you and Terreeria, being true and incredibly brave. So proud to know you, and the only thing that matters is your happiness and your inner peace.

  140. I thought you were going to come out and tell us that you were secretly, madly in love with Pink-Beige. Thank God that wasn’t the case! Can’t imagine how great you must feel this morning after reading all of these wonderful posts from your fans and collegues. Wishing you and Terreeia the best!

    • I’m with you Lee ….a real shocker would have been if Maria’s secret love was of Pink-Beige! Thank goodness that isn’t the case and it looks like she’ll continue to help guide us away from that horror …

  141. I think Crystal’s comment says exactly what I’d like to say, so I’ll quote her: “Your readers are still here, Maria! We love you for your personality, expertise, and your passion for color (and for helping all of us get it right). And nothing about that has changed.”

    You’re good at what you do and I’ve learned so much from you. I won’t stop reading your blog and I wouldn’t have changed coming to your color workshop had I known then. Glad you finally chose to hit “publish”!

  142. Maria, I just read your mom’s comment, and wanted to add how blessed I think you are. I know so many special people whose families do not embrace who they are. Kudos to your mom and much love to you all!
    I believe I got an email from Teerria (sp? I’ll get it right, I promise!) around Christmastime when I was having trouble downloading your e book. She was so nice and helpful. Tell her thank you for me!

  143. Congrats to you both Maria and well done for writing this post – not that it makes a difference in any way to the amazing work you do and your vast knowledge of colour! I hope after today you can relax about it all, anyone who passes judgement is not worth worrying about. Enjoy married life, Terreeia was lovely to speak to at the colour course and seemed very organised. You have a good team with her and Irene!

  144. Maria Micek-Mizera

    And now we know who is the person responsible for that smile we see on all your photos.
    It does not matter to me who is the rock that’s holding you up just glad you have one.

  145. You are a color genius and this fact doesn’t change that at all! I certainly will keep relying on you to give me the latest and greatest about color! Best to you!

  146. So glad you were able to publish this post. I sensed the difficulty in skirting the issue in some of your posts. It has to be freeing for you, and from reading the comments, not a problem for your readers. One part of your post resonated with me. I too am tired of gay man showing off their homes in every shelter magazine I pick up when the women couples are, for some reason, never shown. I resent that the discrimination between men and women is still so rampant. I applaud you for choosing to speak out.

  147. Congratulations on your relationship and your bravery! Personally, I don’t care if someone is lesbian, gay, straight, black, white, brown, red, purple, or polka-dotted – as long as they’re kind and have an interesting perspective to share. You certainly fit the criteria on those two counts!

  148. I hope you did not feel my earlier comment about you potentially being a republican was offensive. I only meant to say that what is important to me as one of your readers is your area of expertise and how you inspire me. So, I will continue reading your blog (even if you are a republican). I’m glad you’re happy. I applaud your bravery. I apologize for my clumsy expression of support.

  149. Maria,
    I love your blog and have been reading it for about 3 years. Nothing could change my opinion of you, and especially not this! I have a close friend who married her partner a couple of years ago, so this is not new to me at all– So happy you have found someone who loves you and whom you love so much. Most people never find that. I will continue to read your blog with much interest in every topic you choose. Best wishes to you both.

  150. Mary Jane Sorensen

    What a heart warming story. Congratulations to you and Terreeia on your wedding. You two are definite soul mates.

  151. “The truth will set you fee”. It always feels best to be honest and I hope you both can feel relief in revealing who you are without having to hide or deny your relationship. Love is meant to be celebrated, it’s what everyone hopes for, and it has nothing to do with gender. Congratulations on your marriage! I’d love to see some wedding pictures too. I’ll bet it was lovely!

  152. Fill the air with colorful balloons, go fly a kite, because you’ve let your spirit soar. Welcome, Terreeia, very happy to meet you!

  153. Congratulations to you both and my respect for your bravery and authenticity! Thanks for your inspiring and informative blog. I hope to meet you in person one day at your workshop.
    Wishing you both continued Happiness,
    Kathy

  154. Congratulations for being completely authentic and living your possibilities! I’ve been reading and recommending your blog practically since its beginning. It is the only blog that I open faithfully and frequently share with people. This post only serves to enhance and reinforce my opinion of your integrity, talent and boldness. I applaud you and suspect that with this beautifully written testimonial to your partnership everything in your life is going to soar even higher. Blessings to you both.

  155. So happy for you! Coincidentally a beloved and gay priest at our Episcopal Church here in Annapolis (southern USA) preached his last sermon with us yesterday morning…only because he’s been called to serve elsewhere! We’ve been blessed by his honest, kind, funny and faithful heart for 6 years. Same sex marriage was just “legalized” here in Maryland a couple months ago so we’ve been priviledged to witness his union become offical! Your love story and reservation (about posting this) has been a gift to us–an example of honesty, bravery, faith and reminder that Love always wins! If you have a chance, here’s yesterday’s sermon on Love, change, acceptance and fighting the good fight–we’re ALL welcome at His table.
    http://youtu.be/WD9bsCF17EY

  156. And here I was all excited to finally be able to click on the link about the best trim colour! I haven’t been reading your blog since day one but always do when the new post comes out. This is beautiful. And brave. I say that from my own experience of not being brave! I know how much you’ve sweated over this. Who and how we love adds an added dimension to everything…especially beauty. Thank you.

  157. Congratulations Maria & Terreeai with your upcoming anniversary! Wishing you both success in your personal & professional lives! You go girls & show them!

  158. Dear Maria,

    Congratulations to you and Terreeia on your marriage and best wishes for many happy years together.

    “The greatest thing you’ll ever learn
    Is just to love and be loved in return”

    All the best,

    Barb

  159. Maria, Thank you for being so open and honest. I would like you to know I’m thrilled for you and Terreeia! It so important to be happy in your own personal live too! I am so impressed with you Maria, you are truly an inspiration to your readers! Congratulations to you and Terreeia, it’s great to finally meet you.
    Happy Anniversary coming soon!
    You go girl! Hugs, Audrey

  160. I read your blog for the invaluable information and attention to detail–you cannot get this anywhere else, in my opinion. Although the personal aspects of ones life do not matter in technical writing, they can’t help but creep in. As you can see from all the above postings, nobody harbors negativity towards your newly revealed personal information, so you surely are relieved. One in business never knows how the wind will blow, hence Terreeia’s apprehension. All is well.

  161. Definitely NOT the end of your blog! I have suspected that your partner was a woman for quite some time. Doesn’t change anything. You are a talented designer and writer and I’m glad you have finally introduced us to your soul mate.

  162. Maria you made me cry this morning. Huge congrats on your marriage, to you and Terreeia. I am so happy for you.

    You may remember me. Our kitchen was featured on your blog (oak to white reno). In that kitchen/home we raised a wonderful amazing boy who just happened to be born gay and grew up into an amazing young man.

    The day he told us, at age 18, we didn’t blink for a second before we told him that it didn’t matter one bit and if being gay made him the person he has become then we are all better for it.

    As parents we are so grateful that we raised a young man with a great sense of self worth who knew he should live is authentic life regardless of whatever closed minded people he should encounter.

    We always told our boys “better to love whom you want than to hate anyone for who they love”.

    You know I have always been a fan of your talent. Now I am a fan of your honesty, integrity and strength.

    Thanks so much for sharing with us.

    Beth

  163. Thank you Terreeia for agreeing to share a part of your life with us; we too love Maria.

    Crystal’s comment about Maria is right on: “We love you for your personality, expertise, and your passion for color (and for helping all of us get it right). And nothing about that has changed.”

    Now lets hope that the US Supreme Court, which is considering the matter of gay marriage this month, recognizes that equality for all is the way
    to go.

  164. Congrats on the love that you have in your life and for standing up for your relationship. Yay for you both, and yay for love!

  165. Hi Maria, well… I believe men and women are meant to be complementary partners for so many reasons but this this not the time or place to be discussing that. I read your blog for its excellent professional advice and will continue to be a subscriber, etc. though it makes me sad to have discovered this discrepancy in our worldviews. More to the point, I was pretty surprised that you put up such a personal post when that really hasn’t been the focus of your blog or what I expect from Colour Me Happy. It IS your blog, though, and obviously you can write what you like in it. Isn’t that the point of blogging?

  166. It is such a shame that you would still feel in this day and age a nervousness about saying you have a wonderful partner, no matter the sex. I am so happy for you. Terreeia is a lovely name and sounds like a lovely person too. Stay happy πŸ™‚

  167. I just wanted to add my congratulationsl. It is a wonderful thing to have found someone to love, and I wish you and Terreeia all the happiness in the world.

  168. How wonderful! Congratulations to both of you!

    Your blogs are inspirational, and now even more so. We (!) wish you great success and much happiness.

    Michelle and Marcia

  169. What’s that Dr. Suess saying again?
    The people who matter don’t mind and the people who mind don’t matter.
    Maria, I drove through Yarrow yesterday on my way home from the mega Chilliwack high school reunion. Had a look at Eco Village. where I think your sister lives. Cool!
    PS. I have your Hostas and they can be planted soon!!
    Jude Hannah
    Amor Vinict Omnia ( Love Conquers All )

  170. Hi Maria & Terreeia,
    You posted that you were married last year and so I guessed it was to Terreeia. I’m very happy for you both and having met you both, I’m delighted to see the happiness that you have each brought to your relationship. Thanks for sharing:)
    Come see us when you are in Seattle, we are just a ferry ride away.

  171. I am so happy Maria. Thank you for being vulnerable and sharing your life with us. I knew this about you before I made the wonderful decision to take your colour expert class. Your success can only continue to grow! Best wishes and congrats my friend!

  172. Maria, the love in these comments comes right through cyberspace. What a wonderful community of people you’ve touched….myself included.
    I am delighted you and Terreeia found each other and are happy. It doesn’t matter to me in the least who you love, as long as it’s joyful and healthy.
    Congratulations to you both….and I hope you both let the freedom of being you (individually and as a couple) inspire you to new heights of creativity.

  173. Oh Terreeia was so wrong about this ending your blog-as a matter of fact you have just made yourself that much more “real” to your readers.
    Bravo Maria!!!

  174. Bravo, Maria. You are an inspiration on so many levels. Now you’ve just added another one. Congratulations to you both!

  175. Finally! I think I have been waiting for you to post who your partner in life is for some time. I felt in my heart you were hiding your relationship and I felt I knew why. We love you, Maria! And those of us who love you will accept you and your Terreeia as you are! Hopefully even those like me who are “conservative, Christian.” We are taught to love one another. I love you for sharing who you really are deep down and it doesn’t make we want to run away from your blog. Makes me want to love you even more! I think the hardest part of this for me is learning to spell your partner’s name! lol!

    God bless you and Terreeia.

  176. Well congratulations on your beautiful relationship! I think going through life with someone to share space with is awesome, whomever that is!

  177. I want to re-read your posts to see if I could have picked up on it or if I am dense. I have been reading for 2 years and am surprised. You know, as soon as you tell someone you are married, the first question is “are you planning kids?” hehe

  178. Maria,
    You and I have talked on the phone for a consult. Such fun! And I have read your blog for a very long time. And I totally knew this without you telling us. And even though I suspect that our politics are completely opposite, I will continue to read, recommend you to friends and wish you and your wife well. Here’s to. Your continued professional success and personal happiness! Both of which you deserve.

  179. I’m seriously on the verge of tears!!! I honestly had no idea, and I’m SOOOOO very glad you posted this! Thank you so much for your honesty, you are amazing!!! And happy almost anniversary! πŸ˜‰

  180. This post suits you, as usual. In the manner you chose. Was surprised, especially at the end! But then, not really after all. As I said, it ws a typical YOU post. So glad to know that you are a happily married couple: very rare. Communication is key, and,at least in my experience, elusive. Looking forward to the total kitchen reveal and, of course, the landscaping.

  181. I am so happy for you Maria!! I met Terreeia at color class and I loved her! We were cracking up in the back of the room about breaks. Congrats to you both!!! xoxoxoxoxo

  182. A belated congratulations to both you and Terreeia on your matrimonial union.
    In closing, (as I think pretty well everything else has been said) respect, cherish and celebrate one another. Wishing you a lifetime of happiness.
    Warm hugs -Brenda-

  183. Who you are is who you are …and who you love is who you love…and what you do is what you do…..and I say you”re excellent at what you do! And that helps me.
    Why would anyone mind that you have love in your life?
    God willing,we all will find the love we seek sooner or later.
    I’ve read but never posted before…but look at all the love your readers are sending your way! Be Happy.

  184. The elephant in the room has been addressed – and funny enough, I’m sure you are the only one who thought it was an elephant. The rest of us are just happy that there is love in your life dear Maria.

  185. Dear Maria:
    I have been a regular subscriber for a very long time and this is the first time I have posted a comment. I have learned so much from you about colours and undertones. Its funny but I was just looking at some realtor ads and my first thought at looking at the bathroom was “Oh gee, look at that – pinky beige and yellow beige in one room – a classic picture for Maria of what not to do.”
    I just want to say that I admire so much your bravery. I think you have helped many many people today by your posting. You are obviously a kind, loving person and I wish you and your partner, great happiness!! Cheers!!

  186. Another congratulations to add to this long list of replies! πŸ™‚ Very happy for the two of you! I appreciate the truth and honesty you bring to this and every post. xoxo, Jill

  187. Congratulations on your wedding and your beautiful relationship. I think a great motto for life is “Choose Happiness!” and I think the two of you have done that !

    Keep on blogging Maria – your advice, your candor and your wonderful personality are enjoyed by so many and yes, even though we haven’t met I feel like I know you from your wonderful posts. You’re
    my “go to” blog for decorating ideas and your writing is fabulous ! xoxoxoxo

  188. Anyone who doesn’t love Terreeia in my books would be insane! I am really happy that you feel you can expose that private part of yourself. In exposing the vulnerability, it gives you strength. Many of us are gay, or in my case I have a gay sibling…she is who she is…which is a great human…just like you!

    Love you TONS!

  189. Thank you for your authenticity. I am so glad that you have found happiness and love. Isn’t that what we are all looking for? I once heard someone say that a persons sexuality is the least interesting thing about them, and I agree. You have so much going for you, keep it up!

  190. Oh, Maria and Terreeia,

    I think Terreeia owes you one, Maria because you were right about your readership and judging from the responses, it’s not the end of your blog. And for those who may drop out, well, we know it’s their problem as already stated in the comments.

    Do you hear that “pop”? That’s the champagne bottle opening to celebrate a happy married couple! Now . . . I smell a gourmet dinner to accompany it! Ahem, Terreria, get out your apron!

    P.S.
    Oh, and the title that Terreria usesβ€”Director of Customer Service and Delightβ€”is as cute as she is.

  191. Maria- I don’t remember how I discovered you one year after you started your blog, but I did and It has been life changing. Like yourself, I am always asking why. So many times in your posts, you’ve been able to give me the because. I have never, ever posted a comment anywhere. You touch my heart today, and I so admire your courage to put your feelings down on “paper” and share them with us all. I wish I had read your post yesterday so I could have sent this out sooner. I’m sitting @ a McDonald’s writing this, and I’m in tears. Happy ones. Thank you to your soul mate for allowing you to publish this post. I have always believed that when you truly care about someone, the love in your heart gives you the strength to put the needs of that loved one before your own. Thank you both.

  192. I’ve been reading your blog for almost a year now and constantly come back as your blog is a design bible for my business. I haven’t posted a comment yet. But after reading this today, made me love and respect you even more. You are a hero. Thanks for your honesty.

  193. Diversity is what makes the world a better place. By diversifying your choice in love and standing out amongst what is the norm you will only be more interesting to me. I am only MORE interested in what you have to say now. Congrats on finding the love of your life to both of you. Blessings and love.
    Jackie in Calgary

  194. Maria,
    Congratulations on your marriage. I could always tell from your writing that you are in a relationship with a female and I am glad that you came right out with it. All your readers love you for your personality and don’t care if you are a lesbian or not. You don’t know me, but I care about you just like a friend I hear from every other day. One of these days soon we are going to do our on-line consultation. You can just be yourself with your readers! We like that you open up and share with us. It makes you a real person to us.

  195. So glad to know more about you. Have been reading you for years. Terreeia is right; you must go vegan! I have been vegan for over a year and look and feel so much better. You have no excuse, especially since Terreeia does the shopping. I wish she would come do my shopping too. πŸ™‚

  196. Brillante Interiors

    Dear Maria, when I read the title my first reaction was of joy…finally she is telling it…then I thought …mmmh it could be one of those titles to attract readers…but luckily my first reaction was right and all I have to say, knowing you for several years is ” it was about time!” We had this conversation time ago about all gay men proud to be. You and Terreeia must also be proud to have found each other and yes she is also a great cook! I am now relieved because your secret, which had no reason to be one, was bugging me. Free to love each other and proud to tell the world! With love, Albarosa

  197. Congratulations, Maria and Terreria! We are all connected and we all live on this beautiful planet together. Hopefully, soon, we’ll get past the labels and just be “humans” and live in harmony.

    PS
    Regarding being vegan–good for you. My son has been a vegan for 5 years and he’s the healthiest person I know. Veganism is about more than just food; it’s about caring for other life forms on this planet and changing things for the better.

  198. Right on, Maria!
    I already knew.
    From one of your students.
    You have really “marched forth” on March fourth!

  199. We all want to love and be loved…you two have something special together. I’m happy for you both and respect you for not hiding anymore!! Congratulations!

    ps I did wonder once why you didn’t ever mention a husband/boyfriend and what he may have thought about colors (brown Lazy Boy anyone?)

  200. Well, it makes sense that you would lead such a colorful life! I hope you are letting out a huge sigh of relief. You have nothing to worry about here. All the best to you both!!

  201. Oh Maria-I’m so glad to know that you have found someone to share your life with. It’s obvious how much you love her and respect her. Please thank her for allowing you to share this part of your life on your blog.

  202. Love the way you express yourself and how you are open to being vulnerable. It allows us to remember what is really important. Thank you for sharing your life lessons along the way…

  203. Heartfelt congratulations, and kudos to the really brave one, Terreeia. I hope that stepping out into the light will prove to be as sunny and warm as your relationship.

  204. Congratulations on finding the “love of your life”.
    I hope that you both will be even happier now that the block of having a secret and having to watch what you say is gone.

  205. Congrats to both of you for being who you are and embracing the honesty of that.
    Happy almost anniversary – Earth Day! WOW! A day of love.
    Maria, you are perfect just as who you are. You too, Terreeia.
    Love

  206. thanks for sharing Maria. it’s no wonder your business thrives and you’re a fabulous writer — you have a great partner to share love and life with. continued success to you both! can’t wait for tomorrow’s post…:)

  207. Congratulations, Maria! That was a wonderful post to read. Sounds like you are both very lucky women to have found each other.

  208. Maria, your posts are continually delightful and inspiring. I have always felt you were a brave soul and in your posts you rely on us to think bravely as well. Thank you for including us in your life. What will you come up with next?

  209. Hi Maria,
    Your write my favorite blog. Two reasons your blog is my favorite. One, I have learned so very much about color and undertones. I have learned far more from your blog than I have from the four interior decorating classes that I took, more from you than the many interior decorating magazines that I subscribe to, and more from you on choosing the correct paint than from my huge library of interior decorating books. The second thing that I so love about your blog is your incredible honesty. Does it matter to me what your preference is for a companion? NO!!!!!!!!! I LOVE your blog and look forward to it. When I see your blog as part of my e-mail, your posting is the first I open. Thanks for all of the wonderful information about paints and undertones, and thanks for your openness and honesty. You are an inspiration to me!

  210. After 256 incredibly positive responses I hope you and Terreeia are both feeling pretty wonderful. Congratulations and good luck in your new marriage! Thanks for sharing with all of us, and don’t even think of stopping your blog!

  211. I LOVE it when women are AUTHENTIC and you embody that, Maria.

    Well done.

    I must say I am delighted that no nasty comments were made here…how refreshing!

    Congrats to two happy people…cheers!

  212. 1st – Congratulations on finding someone you love, getting married, a wonderful blog, and hitting publish on this post.
    2nd – If you are, indeed, sitting and reading these as they come in, you’d better cancel whatever you have planned today and possibly tomorrow.
    3rd – What brings me the most joy is just being a woman today. What wonderful, warm, funny, honest, creative…well you get the idea. I have tears running down my face from all the love, understanding and compassion packed in these posts. Much happiness and success to all of us.

  213. Congratulations Maria – you have been set free! Being much the same personality as you (as you described at the beginning of your post) I get what holding in a secret does to you. It affects everything. So you both faced it with courage and I applaud you. You can see we all do and will love to see more of the complete you in future blogs. We love your color knowledge, your design sense, your very caring advice when we ask… It can only get even better from here on! ❀

  214. Congratulations and thank you for sharing your touching story! Love the picture of the two of you with that sparkle in your eyes!
    Awesome:)

  215. My gosh your personality sounds very much like mine. I too have chosen men from both extremes. I have just come out of a terrible relationship with a man who needed to control. I have learned I need a partner with a strong sense of self – and that does not equate to controlling behaviour. I hope to find the right someone for me just as you have – you make a beautiful couple. I look forward to more fab blogs from here in New Zealand.

  216. Beautiful – All the best.
    And I vote vegan too! Like anything else, with just a little info – which I am sure you and Terreeia will cover πŸ™‚ – you will be just fine nutrient-wise.

  217. Sending you and Terreeia much love today! What a hard post to write!

    On a lighter note,

    1. Do your names rhyme? πŸ™‚
    2. I have become super healthy since last summer and out of all the ways of eating, a Mediterranean diet is the healthiest for your organs and body. (I’ve looked at vegan, vegetarian, Paleo, Atkins, and others and the most recent studies show that a Mediterranean diet full of LOTS of vegetables and very little sugars but some meat and fish is the best for your organs and overall health. Legumes don’t provide enough protein alone without added sugars. But I’d love to hear why you are considering it!)

  218. Absolutely love your blog! I have never commented before, but after 3 years of looking forward to reading you everyday, of appreciating the inspiration you provide and the talent you share with your readers, I feel compelled today to reach out to you and express my heartfelt congratulations and admiration for your courage…May you and Terreeia enjoy many more years of happiness!

    BTW, after quitting a successful career 6 years ago to be a stay-at-home Mom, I’ve just done my own brave thing: registered (at age 43) for the Cert. of Interior Design program at BCIT. It’s funny, I was going to write to you anyways, to thank you for being one of my biggest inspirations regarding this big decision. Not only does your technical advice inspire and foster my love of color/design, but your reoccuring personal themes that involve being true to yourself, how important it is to follow your passions, and how wonderful it feels to love what you do for a living everyday have convinced me to go for it!! Cheers to us brave ones!

    Once again, wishing you a newfound inner peace as a result of your “big decision”, and enjoy feelin’ the love girl! What great feedback you’re receiving from everyone! I hope to see you at one of your Color Workshops in the near future…

  219. Long time reader, and I think it’s great that you shared this. Doesn’t bother me in the least; it’s just a fact about you like “I like Mexican food” or “I hate the smell of roses” etc. Actually, I was starting to wonder what type of man you were with because it was obvious he had forbidden you to write about him on your blog and I thought “well, what a controlling jerk!”.

  220. Congratulations Maria. I just assumed you were in a relationship with a woman because of all the undefined “we”. I hope you are happy and at peace. You should both be happy in your lives. All the best to you both!

  221. Looks like your one year anniversary is coming up soon. And the anniversary gift tradition is “paper.” I think you should print out this post and all the fabulous comments that follow it, put it in an album or frame it and give it to each other. Read it every year on your anniversary.

    Best wishes for a long, happy, healthy, life in marriage and in love!

  222. Thank you to Terreeia for allowing you to publish this post! She’s a fabulous editor, by the way, your posts are always so well written.

    Your mom made me cry, too, and I loved Beth’s comment about her son. So many great comments, I spent way too much time reading them all, but I couldn’t stop. Time to go to work.

    At some point I WILL come up to Vancouver and take a colour class from you. You are amazing.

    Best wishes to you both.
    Kay

  223. Maria – I’m so happy that you are happy in your home life!!! Since you never mentioned your home life I had secretly worried that it was not a happy one, although I realized you might just be a private person. I’m so relieved to know that you are happy and have a soul mate! You are obviously such a caring person, and I had hoped that you had someone that made your heart leap – so glad to get to “meet” her! Thank you for sharing your joyous news, and for sharing your wonderful talent in your blog. Congrats and I hope you both are celebrating in the fabulous responses from your readers!

  224. How wonderful and relieved you must feel to have shed the burden of this “secret”. Count me amoung the lovelies who wish nothing but your happiness. Now, when are you going to post some wedding pics??? πŸ™‚

  225. Congratulations to the two of you, both on your marriage, and on your courage to be authentic and share your personal life with your readers.

  226. Who we love does not define us. It’s the fact that we do love that defines us.
    I too always suspected that your “we” did not include a Mr, and knowing your soulmate is woman does not change a thing. I think it’s wonderful that you finally shared this. Other bloggers share their lives, their loves, their families, and it shouldn’t be any different for you.
    Oh, and before I forget… That’s a lovely picture of the two of you.

  227. Congratulations! So happy that you are no longer afraid and can share through the blogoshere exactly who you are. As a mother of a gay son, it broke my heart while he wrestled with ‘telling’. It is, what it is and you are who you are. You have just made the truth easier for the next person who needs to tell.
    Happy almost 1 year Anniversary!

    • I like this- you were brave, Maria, and it makes it easier for the next one. It is so sad that people struggle with ‘telling’ out of fear. It just doesn’t and ~shouldn’t~ matter.
      Congratulations on your upcoming anniversary.
      Carol

  228. Best wishes to you both! Thank you for sharing your life with all of us. I respect and admire you. I’ve been following you for a year now and your happiness shows through in your writing πŸ™‚

    PS I just ordered my first white kitchen for our new house.

  229. Really Maria?
    As far as I’m concerned TMI (too much information)
    If it makes you feel better coming out of the closet, more power to you. I’m not a fan of same sex relationships, but I will still be a fan of yours.

  230. Congratulations Maria, for finding love and for having the courage to show everyone who you are. I think your risk paid off and what an amazing thing to discover that people will love and respect you just for you.

  231. well, I hope the absolute outpouring of love that you’ve received from this post has convinced you never to hide who you really are.

    I adore you even more for being so honest and vulnerable. And as for being married to a woman? Who cares? πŸ™‚

    Glad you found your soul mate.

    xoxox

  232. I gotta say. I saw the email entitled “My One Big Secret You Didn’t Know” from you in my mailbox and was gleefully looking forward to opening it early this morning but life got in the way. I had one foot in homework and dinner and customers and laundry so I wondered a few times today what the “secret” was. Would it be a new color combo? Would you walk back your comments on how white can look dingy or dirty in low light homes (I’m crushing on all white right now)? I started reading and for the first few moments thought WTH! I thought maybe I deleted your post and ended up in a gay porn ad. However, as I read along I started to smile. How wonderful for you and of you to share your life with us in this way. I tell my son we are all a work in progress. If we are lucky we love more than once in our lives. We learn, we grow, we change but in many ways remain essentially who we are. Terreeia (to use a line from Jerry Maguire) “completes you”. In all the ways that matters and that is more beautiful that a new BM paint chip, or duvet cover or even the best meal at the French Laundry. I am so glad you shared your one big secret but make sure you never use the word secret again in anything you do. Don’t ever be afraid to “hit publish” in life. Others learn so much when they see that you can put it out there with little regrets. Thank you for making my day.

  233. I’m so thrilled with the many, many wonderful comments, and can only repeat what others have said: not surprised, already figured it out, and LOVE IS ALL THERE IS!!! So happy for you both, and sending love and best wishes. Also – your blog has changed my life. I’m also a color consultant, and you’re my role model. I’ve learned so much from you that I sometimes feel like a copycat. I had a difficult client this morning who wouldn’t listen to a word I said since she’d already made up her mind what color she wanted. I was frustrated, but found myself repeating your principles, and knew I was on the right track even if she didn’t get it. Thanks for giving me so much information, and the confidence I need to do what I love. You’ll always have my unconditional love and support, no matter what!

  234. Congratulations to both of you.
    I have read your blog for years but have never commented. I’ve learnt so much from you and really appreciate your ‘here’s what I think, take it or leave it’ attitude.
    I think you are fabulous!

    But you’re thinking of going vegan?? That truly is shocking – what about all the salmon, and oysters, and mussels….!

    All love, Fiona

  235. I am a longtime reader but have never commented. This post made me a little sniffy. You share so much of your life and thoughts through this blog; thank you for sharing “the we of me” with us. I wish you a long and happy life together.
    Several of my favorite blogs have ended recently and I was afraid from the heading that you were going to stop blogging! Keep up the good work!

  236. I so enjoyed meeting you and Terreeia at your Atlanta colour course two years ago, Maria! I’m glad you have found happiness. It’s such a precious commodity. All the best to both of you!

  237. Fabulous post. I admire you and respect you even more. All the best to you and Terreeia. Keep on making the world a more colourful, prettier place.

  238. Maria-
    I don’t want to minimize the emotional struggle it has been for you to make this announcement, so I hope you know I mean it in the best possible way when I say “So what?!!”. πŸ™‚
    I’m so happy for you that you don’t have to hide this part of your life anymore, and I wish you and Terreeia many happy and colorful years together!

    • Me too! I thought it would just be something colour related! I’m glad that not needing to announce it any more sounds like it will be a relief. It’s wonderful that you’ve found each other. That’s a truly lucky chance-y thing. Isn’t it awesome that the world has grown up so much (and yet still not enough – but at least it’s underway). I’d long guessed my aunt was bi and then that a friendship was more intense than that. It was awesome that they just shifted their language a little in public (which made it obvious) and everything just carried on as before plus a bit of extra happiness. May that be the same for you!

      I’m a fan of celebrating all good things so I hope you get out the champagne for publishing!

  239. I always looked at your reno pictures and wondered where you found the amazing man who let you change whatever you wanted in your new home to your heart’s desire. Now I know the answer – there is no such man! It was great meeting you a couple weeks ago. I can’t wait to implement your ideas and suggestions!

  240. I want to make another comment, this time about labeling. I have a friend from college who dated men when I first knew her, then spent a couple decades with only women. Then, in her mid-forties, she fell madly in love with a man and got married. As her straight friend, I admit that I didn’t always get where she was going. Although she identifies as bisexual, I don’t think it matters what she calls herself. She’s always been true to her feelings, and has been with the people she cared about. It’s all good, it’s all about love. I don’t think labels really matter, nor can they explain the human heart.

  241. Beautiful day for being real. Thank you Maria for sharing of yourself today. We are still enjoying our new home you helped us choose colours for.

  242. Maria, Thank you for sharing your story. I feel the same thing about my head-millions of details swimming around-often these thoughts get in the way of action. I also have a terrible temper!I will look into these courses. Also, I hope that you feel relief about telling us about your relationship. I am only commenting today to convince you that your readers will remain as loyal as ever and I am saddened that you and Terreeia felt that you could not be free to share. I have only one problem with your post- DO NOT GO VEGAN. GO PALEO! check out “Mark’s Daily Apple” Been there and back. Keep Happy! πŸ™‚

  243. Someone mentioned that there were no negative comments. Well duh? Comments are moderated. We live in a very PC world right now so negative comments would be excoriated by the moderator in two seconds flat.

    First of all, I frankly feel a bit of compassion for the poor schmuck who married Maria 15 years ago. His guy friends must be having a grand ole time at the local bar. Secondly, Maria isn’t a lesbian – really. What constitutes a lesbian these day – just saying you are or acting out the part? From the pictures, it looks like Maria needs a mother figure, not a partner. Sorry folks, but the sappy accolades are getting old. There is something wrong with this picture, even for lesbians.

    • Well Connie it looks like your negative comments have survived. Comment moderation is up to the discretion of the website operator. Some moderate, some do not.

      Did leaving this comment make you feel proud?

      Regardless of your feelings on same sex relationships, it seems you’re a very shallow person and only concerned with appearances and public perception. PROOF OF POINT #1: Oh, the poor ex-husband — whatever will his friends THINK. How awful for him.
      PROOF OF POINT #2: And then you look at the picture of Maria and her partner and make judgements and jumped to conclusions based on what you perceive to be an age difference. If her partner had been an older distinguished gentleman would you have had the same reaction? I’m guessing not. Employing your logic, when you see a picture of Catherine Zeta Jones and Michael Douglas you must immediately think that she’s looking for a father figure and he’s, um, er, mmm . . . looking for a daughter figure.

      Sorry Connie, but your uninformed views of human sexuality are beyond old. If you really want to see what’s wrong with this picture, look in the mirror.

      • Frank, you obviously are a member of the gay community or you would not be so defensive. It always astounds me that you people never leave room for opposing opinions or observations. Since you are the expert in human sexuality (lol), you may want to share your sources. I have two lesbian friends in a committed relationship who are also parents of children. They are approximately the same age and both are business owners and highly successful in their respective fields. If they were writing their story, however, they would own up to being lesbian rather than saying that they had gotten married “on Earth Day” (how terribly sweet), but “I am not a lesbian”. That is the most laughable statement in the entire post. As to Maria’s former victim – oops I meant to say husband, no wonder the poor guy couldn’t meet her expectations or as she says “they couldn’t communicate”. Her life was a lie and she used the guy as a foil. Yes, I do feel sorry for him. I hope he has moved on and I hope his buddies at the local watering hole aren’t saying “told you so”. As to the mother/grandmother/nanny figure – I think the photo speaks for itself.

        • Well, Connie, I too am a member of the ‘gay community’, and I’m a hetero female married to a hetero male for 34 years. We’re ALL members of the gay community, like it or not. You seem such an expert of lesbians and how they define themselves…why the vitriol? Please do educate us! Your remarks reveal you to be pretty unhappy with yourself…is your life a battleground? Is everyone out to get you? I am so sorry to learn it, but can’t really help if you won’t see the other side. Therapy might help. Just give it a thought. Meanwhile, go slash up someone’s clothes or something, in the closet. It’s more fun here out in the sunshine, I must say. My best to you and all your MANY loved ones…

        • Connie – Actually I’m a straight man that’s been happily married for the past 35 years and have 4 adult children and 7 grand children.

          I have no problem with people holding or expressing opposing opinions — provided they are voiced in an intelligent, well-reasoned, insightful and respectful way. You don’t have to agree with how others live their lives. But you don’t have to express that disagreement with sarcastic and vitriolic remarks.

          An interesting aspect of your comments is that you seem to have no problem with same sex relationships. Your issues seem to be:
          1. You don’t believe that someone can be bisexual and must assume a label of straight or lesbian.
          2. You assume Maria intentionally deceived a man by marrying him.
          3. Couples in a relationship must be close in age.

          Apparently it’s beyond your life experience to comprehend and accept as fact that some people are physically and emotionally attracted to both sexes. Ask yourself if you would have reacted less vehemently if Maria had written that she was bisexual rather than stating that she’s not a lesbian? As for her ex-husband, nobody, except for him and Maria, are privy to what when on in their relationship. Why are you so fixated that he might be the butt of jokes.

          P.S. For the record, I think my M.D., PhD degrees and a 30 year practice in human sexual development specializing in human sexual development and health and responsible sexual behavior likely trumps your ” I have two lesbian friends [approximately the same age] in a committed relationship who are also parents of children.”

          When you finally take that HONEST look in the mirror you may want to explore why the fact that Maria was once married to a man bothers you so much. Also, consider why you fixate on what YOU ASSUME to be a huge age difference between Maria and her partner (you made it a point to write that you’re friends are “approximately the same age”) resonates so strongly with you. Did a man once leave you for another man? Are attracted to gay men? Perhaps you have some deep seated daddy issues (or god forbid, mommy issues) of your own.

          In 30 years of practice I’ve learned that more often than not, Shakespeare got it right: “The lady doth protest too much, methinks.”

          Best of luck to you Connie. Forgive me for violating my internet commenting policy of “Don’t feed the trolls!” Your fixations and vitriol were just too psychologically interesting to resist. My bad!

  244. As you said, as a regular reader, this has been my assumption for a while. I’m glad you’ve decided to speak openly about it, because Terreeia sounds amazing, and it must have been so constraining to not mention her.

  245. Maria, based on these great and supportive comments, your intuition was bang on. Now that you are fully in your integrity, you have a stronger foundation for what you create in the future. I am chuffed and delighted for you both, and for all that you contribute to the world.

    With honour, respect, and love…

  246. “The truth shall set you free”. When I came to your class in February 2011 in Atlanta, it changed and openned my vision of color. Yes the class was fantastic, but in reality it was you, Maria, as a person, and there was a connection with Terrerria as well. First, congratulations on your marriage. I couldn’t believe when Terreria offered to go to Whole Foods and pick up my sweetner. I said “NO” that is not necessary. She insisted…Who would do that??? The chemistry of your relationship shined. I saw it. I am so fond of Terreria and you. Your blogs are second to none. This truth can only increase the quality of your classes and blogs. I love you both:)

  247. Who or what you are is not important. It is your sharing and creative soul which is why I like your blog. Your advice is the important thing for me. My designer daughter keeps saying you really have a thing about undertones. But I finally feel I am getting to understand colours at long last. Best wishes.

  248. Maria,
    I’ve never posted before but felt I needed to this time.
    Who you love makes no difference. I will continue to read your excellent blog.
    Glad that you found happiness in your life.
    Congratulations to you both!

  249. Congratulations on your freedom to be.
    I read your post out loud to my husband. We were both moved to tears. Anyone who meet their soul mate in life is blessed, (I know, I’ve met mine), regardless of gender!
    All the best to you both.

  250. What a wonderful post! I’m glad you wrote this, although I’m a bit sad to think that we still live in a world where announcing that you’ve married someone you love can be so fraught with tension. I’ve been following you for years and I had no idea. Belated congratulations on your wedding and early congratulations on your anniversary!

  251. You dear girl, never judge yourself by how the world judges you. We would all come up pitifully short. I could not care less if you are pink with purple stripes or if your beloved is male or female. THAT IS YOUR BUSINESS and please don’t ever let anyone tell you otherwise. In this world, happiness is hard to obtain and even harder to hold on to. So, please, forget about everyone else and make your home your haven. Close the door on the outside world and only let friends enter. Have a wonderful life!

  252. Congratulations & best wishes to you both! First time commenter, but I’ve been reading for a while, & if ever there was a time to comment it is now. I look forward to hearing more from you both.

  253. I worried that the title meant a retirement from the blog and the beautiful pictures . . . I was feeling sorry for us, the readers. Just a few days ago you gave us that great tip on the dressing better/more fashionable blog (I do not remember the name – it’s on a bookmark.) and now another post so quickly. . . and then the many, many enthusiastic responses – I did not think they would every end.

    Another great day and happy message from Maria! Congratulations on finding a good partner – they are hard to find and keep!
    ~Nor

  254. Such a cute picture of you two….and just so you know, the only reason I will quit reading your post is if you start advising all us “LOVELIES” to use pink beige and install honey oak cabinetry. I am in the middle of spending millions and millions of pennies transforming my old place into a thing of beauty, and I am loving the changes so far. I love using your color boards….they really help me. All the best for you and Terreeia!

  255. Sorry I’m just now reading this–I would have given you a huge congratulatory hug today!!! Cheers to you and your happy!!!! Xoxo

  256. Maria, Congratulations from Ohio, its not a huge surprise, but a most welcome one-it probably has been so hard on both of you,you have been together for a long time and it must feel so wonderful and freeing to be able to express your love now-you make a great team together, because your blog is awesome and it is nice to know you have someone who always has your back-life is short, people need to grab happiness whenever they can and with whoever they wish to be with-so cheers to both of you!!!!

  257. It feels great to be included in your happiness, Maria. Thank you for sharing your life with us! I was really beginning to wonder who you were building this beautiful home with. Congratulations and peace and love to you both. xoxo

  258. Congrats Ladies! Maria I am so happy you had the courage to hit “post”. I hope you will both live happily ever after…

  259. Maria, Ok you are married, someone made an honest woman out of you ( LOL) ……… oh, yes it is a woman too ! ………. so ?
    You are happy ! that is what really counts, !
    I know that you are an amazing person, so it is fitting that you found that happiness. Congratualtions on your marriage, GOD bless you and Terreeia.

  260. Dear Maria,

    Because we are living in the era of total pretention /she has a big house than she is smart, they have a lawn with no weeds they are folowing the rules of pesticide, she is so tiny that she can fit to the magazine and so on/ these are just a few comparisons to post.
    Love,honesty are the one of thouse highest vibrations what we can ever share in our lives. To judge you as it was mentioned in may of these posts is just a low level of inteligence and lacking compasion. It was proved by science that people in love and being loved are more analytical and they have extremely high level of creativity.I wish you only more love and many years of success what nobody can take away from you.
    All the best for you and Terreeia.

  261. Maria,
    Do you have any idea how many comments I had to scroll through to leave a reply??? You have gathered to you an amazing readership. I don’t believe that is an accident. And the beautiful thing is the resounding message is Congratulations. Have a loving and happy life.
    BTW…I too was nervous when I read the header for this post…was afraid it was something like…Hi, my name is Maria…and I secretly love pink beige. Your actual news was such a relief! Okay..now it’s my turn…Congratulations have a loving and happy future together you two!

  262. Congratulations to you both! So glad you shared your secret I love reading your blog and ive learned so much. Thanks!

  263. Congratulations and all the best for a long and happy life together Maria and Terreeia! Two people in love is the most beautiful gift we have with one another! Enjoy spending your life together unwrapping the gift day by day! Denise

  264. I adore you both, it was indeed a great day when I met you and Terreea …..the futures so bright your gonna need shades!

    PS….your mom….sigh….so awesome!

  265. Now that’s what I am talking about!

    You are amazing and I love you even more now for showing us all how to stand up for those we love but more importantly, who we love.

    Congratulations to you both!

  266. Congratulations Maria and Terreeia! Wishing you a forever of happiness! Proud of you Maria, I know this blog has been long in coming. Thanks Terreeia for letting her share!

  267. Bright Ideas for the Home

    I always did wonder about the WE. I kept thinking so where is he anyway. Who cares what others think. If you are happy and fulfilled that is the most important thing. Life is so short and Maria, you only get one shot at living it well, so good for you. Stay happy and fulfilled. I hope I get to meet you and finally take your course. For reference…I am 66 years old and started my design career 3 years ago, so I know a little about what I speak.

  268. So proud of you Maria for telling the world and stepping into your truth! You know we all love you for who you are not for who you’re with. I couldn’t be happier for you and obviously all the other 300+ commenters feel the same way…otherwise we would not have scrolled down for 2 minutes to leave a comment!

  269. Linda @ House of Chandler

    I see trees of green…….. red roses too
    I see em bloom….. for me and for you
    And I think to myself…. what a wonderful world.

    I see skies of blue….. clouds of white
    Bright blessed days….dark sacred nights
    And I think to myself …..what a wonderful world.

    The colors of a rainbow…..so pretty ..in the sky
    Are also on the faces…..of people ..going by
    I see friends shaking hands…..sayin.. how do you do
    They’re really sayin……i love you.

    I hear babies cry…… I watch them grow
    They’ll learn much more…..than I’ll never know
    And I think to myself …..what a wonderful world

    I immediately thought of “What A Wonderful World” song lyrics sung by Louis Armstrong when I read ‘Are most people in the world so small that they can’t accept other people for their differences? in your post.

    I’m not as eloquent as others are who have posted comments. But, I want you and Terreeia to know you have my heartfelt acceptance. I wish you and Terreeia joy and happiness, and continued success in all you do.

    • I think you said it quite nicely Linda! I’m on the half of the people who hadn’t a clue…but it was never an issue, I simply accepted what you chose and chose not to discuss as a personal matter and whatever your reasons were, it was okay with me.

      But that being said, now you’ve mentioned the “v” word…a path I started a couple of years ago….I’m looking forward to hearing more about that! Eating for the highest nutrition possible renewed my interest in cooking and I’m sure Terreeia will do wonderful vegan creations in the lovely new kitchen you’ve created! Blessings to you both!

  270. It is fantastic to read all the comments with tears in my eyes this morning hoping you realize how much your blog means to so many of us. I immediately felt a woman with a yellow sofa must be doing something right because no unhappy person could ever have the gumption to own that. Completely inspiring that you followed your heart in both love and design. The payoffs appear big.

  271. Maria, out most of yesterday and couldn’t respond, but one comment for now: If/when you come to Arizona one day to do your Color Workshop (and I hope it won’t be the 10 or so years it takes trends to reach my backward state), you’d better talk Terreeia on coming with you. The pleasure of finally meeting you in person would be doubled by the pleasure of meeting her too. If you had posted her picture alone first with no info, I’d have immediately thought “Wow! That face, that smile – wouldn’t she be a fun person to know!” More later …

  272. The only part of this post that makes me sad is that it needed to be a secret in the first place. Congrats on your wedding and kudos for coming out and sharing all of you! Eventually we will create a society where we all feel free to be who we are, and no one will have to live in fear of discrimination.

  273. Alice LΓ©tourneau

    You are so generous Maria about your knowledge, your life, your love and about how you made this bloog. I am realley Impress.
    Sharing her life with you, I am shure Terreeia is a wonderful person. Congratualtions on your marriage.
    Hope to be able to follow your worrkshop. I’am crazy about colour and so glad I found your blog because ive learned so much. Thanks!

  274. Hi Maria, I will always love and pray for you.
    We are of differing mindsets, but friendship to me,
    is unconditional. You are always the Little Sparkle
    to me!

  275. I’ve never posted anywhere, ever, but I feel so inspired to congratulate you both on your recent marriage and on your bravery- Maria, for opening yourself up to love and happiness no matter how unexpected it might have been. And Terreela, for suspending your fear of disaster if you show everyone your authentic self. Thank you both for sharing, this and everything.

  276. Hi Maria
    I haven’t met you – yet – but I had the pleasure of having coffee with Terreeia last week and you were an integral part of her sharing of who she is. I underscore your comment about her being a fabulous communicator.
    I look forward to meeting you one day as well. Thank you for sharing your truth and your love.

  277. Hi Miss Maria….Welcome to our world, Miss Terreeia!

    I have always emailed you directly – as not so successful getting the blog entry correct.

    The most important part of being human is having the ability to love…and to be loved. How that happens is not to be judged…The only thing we can all wish for you is to treasure your shared love, and love the Joy you both bring to each other and to the world each day! Thank you, Maria, for sharing your heartsong of Joy with all of us! Hugs, Mindy

  278. Congratulations and best wishes ! Shows the strength & power of love from your excellent decision to hit ” publish”. Can’t wait to see you and Terreeia in a shelter magazine in your beautiful home. When is a Color Workshop in scheduled for Los Angeles? Hope it’s soon…

  279. Good for both of you! Love is love regardless of the sexes… When you find your soul mate you it’s a real blessing! So enjoy your happy life Maria!

  280. Kudos for the bravery and congrats on the wedding!!!
    I love your blog and am glad that you have found your soulmate. If someone decides not to continue following your great advice and insight because of this it’s their loss.

  281. Congratulations on your new-found freedom by telling your secret. Someday our world will be more accepting so that people in same-sex relationships can be as open and free as everyone else.

    I found it interesting what you said about gay men being heralded in the shelter mags while gay women are ignored. I think most people thing of design being a feminine talent, and often see gay men as feminine. Whereas many people tend to see gay women as masculine. Obviously that’s a generalization, but I wonder if more women related to gay men than gay women because they see them as “girlfriends.” Who knows?!

    One of my hopes for the future is that everyone, no matter what color, sexual orientation, religion/not, social status, country of original, whatever, are treated equally and given the same opportunities to shine.

    Congratulations on finding someone that can put up with you (I’m quite sure I’m difficult to live with too!), and I wish you many more happy years together!

  282. Hi Maria,
    I’ve been reading your blog for quite a while and have learned so much about colours and undertones, etc.. I think you’re great at what you do and wish I could hire you. I’m really touched by your vulnerability since putting this out there would certainly have taken some courage. Like many other readers, I kind of figured it out. As a Christian, however, I have to say that God’s plan for our lives is a heterosexual lifestyle and that according to the bible, homosexuality is a sin. At the end of the day, however, I am not posting this to condemn you as that is not my heart..and also because you didn’t have to let us into your personal life. I’m posting it out of concern for your soul. Having said that I will continue to read your blog because you’re a skilled designer and I especially look forward to posts about your new home.

  283. So Inspiring, I love you both so much!!! Thank You for sharing yourself and the miraculous relationship you have! I look forward to seeing you soon, lets plan something to celebrate the miracles and birthdays so far this year:) BTW I love you 2 in blue!

  284. Maria,

    My sweet blog friend…I support all you do. May you both feel the blessings that Love adds to your relationships both personal and professional!

    Thank You for (Both) for being You…

  285. Coming out of lurkdom to wish you joy! I’m sad you had to worry about the cost of being yourself on your own blog.

    Does this mean you never have to argue about painting ugly wood? πŸ™‚