My 5 Rules for Life

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Have you ever thought about this statement with regards to an area in your life?

“Every single day people stop when they don’t know what to do.”

I talk to clients every day who tell me they have stopped shopping for their house because they’ve bought so many mistakes in the past and they don’t want to buy any more.

Designers who don’t make as much money as they should because they don’t have the confidence to specify hard finishes, fabrics, paint colours, the list goes on. You might be a smart businesswoman, but if you can’t diagnose colours in a room and know what to do, you’re missing the biggest piece of the design puzzle.

I’ll never forget one of the first calls I received in the beginning of my career where a client wanted me to specify colours for all the finishes in her kitchen.  It was almost impossible for me to explain to her why I made the suggestions I did because I didn’t know how to articulate my own aesthetic.

It took me thousands of hours before I got clear about the what and why of my suggestions and before I discovered THE proven system for understanding colour.

Have you ever thrown your hands up in frustration because you buy something online and it seems like a totally different colour when it arrives at your doorstep?

Once you Understand Undertones™, shopping online becomes a lot easier because you can distinguish which category of undertone you’re actually looking at.

And this leads me to my first rule of life which took me many years to learn.

Here are my five rules for life:

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If you’re passionate about something but you are not an expert, get yourself trained and then go somewhere where you can practice it over and over again until you gain confidence.

This year, I was determined to learn how to use my DSLR Camera, and luckily the same instructor offered a Photoshop course that I also registered for.

After I learned all the basics in the classroom, I hired the instructor for one hour every two weeks to help me personally with a real time project so that I would retain what I had learned.

Back in 2000 when I did my first colour course and decided I was going to be an internationally known colour expert, I decided the best way to get there was to work in a paint store where I would end up doing thousands of consultations which quickly got me to 10,000 hours.

And it was how I discovered the proven system for understanding and specifying colour.

Know yourself, Get your Personality Tested.

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Before I figured out that I am most suited to be an Entrepreneur (ENTJ), I suffered badly in careers that were NOT me at all. And then got fired 8 times over a period of 20 years before I discovered that I should just be self-employed.

No matter how self aware we are, we all have blind spots and there are certainly many other personality assessments or psychometrics out there that give you a different angle.

When Terreeia works with her coaching clients, she gives them a DISC assessment. A different cut on 4 different communication styles. When we are having a meeting and I’m being impatient it helps for her to know that I’m a D (Driver) She can then use that knowledge to respond in a way that gets the best out of me.

Penelope Trunk and I did a Meyers Briggs personalty course together last January with 16 different personality types and it was so great. Everyone loved it so much that I still get emails from participants who mention it.

Ginny from Feels Like Home to Me said:

“Amazing webinar! Always thought “E” denoted someone who loved being around lots of people, the life of the party. Processing out loud makes one an “E” was so interesting. I always thought my husband was an introvert and I an extrovert—-we are both “E”. Now I know we both need to just let each other talk and process : ) Understanding your weaknesses and strengths is empowering. Thank you two for this!”

If you missed out, you can still download it on demand here.

My life would have looked very different and I probably would have arrived where I am a lot faster had I understood my personality in my early 20’s.

There’s so much freedom that comes from knowing and understanding who you are.

Be Generous and Forgive Quickly

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This I learned from my Mom who doesn’t tolerate any gossip for even 5 seconds.

And my youngest sister Elizabeth is the same which is why she is also one of my best friends. In fact, when Elizabeth got married 10 years ago, there were so many people who went to the microphone and spoke about the feeling of her entire wedding and how much love was in the room and I’m clear it was Elizabeth who created that. She is a totally loving, beautiful soul.

I’ll often walk up to Terreeia if I’ve upset her (which happens, we work together too) I’ll say “Honey, you have to forgive, the Bible says 77 x 7 times (which means ALL THE TIME) so please forgive me AGAIN!

And thankfully she does, which makes my life much happier. In my past life, I was married to someone who would ignore me for three whole days before I could be forgiven. And well, that’s why he’s an EX.

I also want to take this opportunity to acknowledge Irene Hill for being a shining example of love and forgiveness too. Terreeia and I are really lucky that she is our Director of All Things Wonderful.

Here’s a link to one of the best articles I’ve read on forgiveness.

Be Authentic and Just Give People Real information. No BS.

Those of you who read my blog regularly (Have I told you lately that I love you?)  will already know this about me.

So many people worry that giving away their hard earned knowledge on a blog will not generate business for them, but then they are surprised when the opposite happens.

Just because you give someone ‘the answer’ doesn’t mean they will be able to do it themselves.

When I called my Landscape Architect back in 2013 when I was shopping for shrubs and plants for my huge landscape project, I said:

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“MaryAnne, I’m standing here looking at Bobo Hydrangeas, should I buy them for my backyard?”

She responded “Of course, don’t you remember, I blogged about them last week?”

I have told that story many times since to illustrate my point.

I had no recollection of her post, even though I read her blog, because I am NOT a garden designer/professional, so even if I did remember, I still needed her, as my designer, to tell me which hydrangeas were right for my garden, and in the spot where I planned to install them.

Also in the spirit of being authentic, if you have a blog, never give generic advice that anyone could google in 30 seconds flat. Weave your personality into your blog posts so a reader can decide whether they like you and will continue to follow you and then, someday soon, do business with you.

Be Responsible

Stuff happens but the faster you accept responsibility and move on, the better.

I think being the oldest of four girls already gave me responsibility as a part of my personality but participating in Landmark courses for 10 years through my 30’s really gave me responsibility as the foundation from where I live my life.

Whenever something happens, I am quick to look to see where I caused it and be responsible (which is where all your power is anyway), and because I’m so fast to do it, I immediately notice when others don’t do the same thing. And truthfully, I could generate a little more compassion when I’m someone’s customer and I don’t feel like I’m getting the service I would give and expect.

So be responsible and just own up to your mistakes. Period.

These are my rules for life, and we all have our own because they come from years of experience, trial and error!

What’s one of your best rules for life?

If you would like to transform the way you see colour, become a True Colour Expert